Palaung - Marriage and Family

Marriage. Villages are normally endogamous units in which polygyny is permitted, though rare. A man may not marry his father's sister's daughter nor the daughter of his own sister or brother. There is some indication that the preferred marriage is with a mother's brother's daughter. Courtship takes place at the woman's house, late at night, after her parents have gone to sleep. In the central Palaung area this takes place in the entrance room where one or more men may visit a woman to engage in conversation, which follows a stylized convention. In other areas the men must stand under the house and converse with the woman through cracks in the floor of her sleeping room. Sex relations are apparently uncommon. A man who fathers a child and refuses to marry the mother must pay a fine. If she refuses to reveal his identity, her father must pay a fine to the elders to appease the local tiger spirit. Parents usually learn the identity of a woman's suitors and may praise or criticize them, but more direct interference is not the norm. Engagements are entered into without explicitly informing parents or obtaining their permission. In the central Palaung area marriage is traditionally by elopement, whereas elsewhere elopement may occur only because of parental disapproval. The eloping couple may go to the house of an older male relative of the man's father while several days of marriage negotiations are carried out by two part-time specialists skilled in traditional rhetoric. The woman's family expects a sum of money from the man's family, but this is regarded as help toward the wedding meal provided by the bride's family rather than as bride-price. The wedding is formalized by a blessing of the elders, after which the woman is surrendered and her parents send with her a dowry of household goods. Residence is initially patrilocal and a widow may either remain in her husband's home or return to her father's.

Domestic Unit. Information is not precise, but the domestic unit is probably the nuclear family along with some semi-detached individuals such as an unmarried brother or widowed parent.

Socialization. Spirit worship and Buddhism are strong forces for socialization. Young children are cared for almost exclusively by their mothers. Older children enjoy considerable freedom while learning work tasks and are taught to regard work as a source of enjoyment. Specially chosen young adults teach children poetry and customs of courtship, and prepare them for the prüh ceremony, a preadult initiation occurring around 10 years of age. Childhood training emphasizes courteousness, Buddhist merit, knowledge of spirit forces, and the learning of a vast corpus of poetry, songs, and metaphorical phrases necessary for social interaction. Almost every Palaung village has a monastery compound that serves as the traditional school in which boys receive their few years of formal education.